I chose not to go to church today and couldn't think why I had made that choice. I enjoy it and try not to miss a Sunday. I didn't go to a class I'd recently started attending before the service and then I stayed home through the service, too. I had a really painful crick in my neck the last couple of days and I figured maybe that's why I felt like staying home, but it felt so much better when I awoke this morning that I knew it really wasn't that. Then WHY?
The phone a couple of hours later. It was a woman with whom I've become reacquainted in the last few weeks. She's not well at all and has had horrible troubles since I last had her in my bible study group (non church-related) about 7 years ago. I hadn't seen her these last few years and was surprised to see her back at the study and I was asked if I'd have her in my group. There had been a problem with her those years ago and I said I thought she'd be better in someone else's group, but then I suddenly felt she's just who I needed in my group. She seemed delighted that I'd be her leader but seemed uncomfortable in the class. She asked me not to call on her for answers as we went through the homework unless she raised her hand and she asked that she not be included on our group Prayer Chain because "I'm intensely private". Then, after a couple of weeks, she was chiming in with responses and agreed that I could put her health on the prayer chain. Sadly, her health has taken another bad turn and she has decided she can't come anymore. But, I emailed her support and she's really opened up via email to me.This morning, when she called, she said "I needed someone like you to talk with and I'm so glad you're home..."
Then I knew why I hadn't gone to church. I'm glad I was home, too. Church is letting out as I type. I wouldn't have been here.
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28
God is amazing. Actually, to tell the truth?... in my frame of mind the last few days, I needed to be here more than she needed me to be here.
z
14 comments:
Z, God sometimes closes a door for a purpose and today you realized , I think, that not always is it our idea to do something or not to do something . In this case you found out that God had a better plan and isn't that always the case when we let Him lead?
Don't question. Just do. I think you did the better thing, although that is not always obvious. Now, to keep from being the ultimate hypocrite about attending church, I will shut up.
Ticker, it was a more subtle thing than the usual 'nudge' I feel I get. The non-nudgy thing, the so subtle desire to stay home...that taught a whole lesson, too.
Bob...I don't 'fight' the church thing here anymore.
Let me first say that there is nothing for Christian as good as a good Church experience full of people who share your faith, a pastor who isn't perfect but can listen to criticism and always sets the best example he can, a structure that feels worshipful, music that helps the whole experience..wonderful classes, happy parties for various occasions, meaningful funerals because you knew the dead so well....THAT IS THE BEST.
And I had that for a few years... Now let's just say that I'm about ready to let my church experience by more of a "Me at home" experience for many reasons. I will say that, while I was happy at the church we attended for 9 years, the realizations of what was going on there, getting worse and worse, has really hardened me about any church at all. Or denominations, frankly. Altho I have to say Martin Luther's teachings are so important and ring so true for me that I'll never let the Lutheran thing too far from my heart, though the LUtheran church is letting itself die in amazing ways...very VERY sad. And it's only one of the churches going into extinction, in my opinion.
NOTHING to do with Jesus, of course...if they had more to do more with Jesus, they wouldn't be in trouble in many ways.
Z - Some even say that -
He is an Awesome God.
I'm glad - Z - that you are such a person that follows your Heart - enough to stay home - when you usually go to Church.
And I'm sure that the Lady is glad that she knows you - too.
Isn't it neat to see how God leads us, even when we're not exactly sure why or how. I'm so glad you were there to listen to this lady.
I helped a sister with her car after church 2 weeks ago. I couldn't do any more and suggested a car shop I trust (I just posted about it, in fact). I did not see her last Sunday, and today was our annual business meeting. I asked where she was last week as I was concerned, and she said she thought the business meeting was last week and laughed. She got caught.
:-)
Hugs-
Carol
Ed, where did you post that? I looked all over your web page..??
Z,
I think I understand what you are talking about. Apart from the normal politics that accompany any organization, even churches, there is always some extra stuff going on.
I am a Methodist, and the Methodists move their ministers around, with the average tenure at a church being around two or three years. Just when you are getting your relationship down pat with your minister, they will move them. A lot of people tend to change churches based on that one thing.
My wife and I are stay-at-home members, now. We love our church and our church family. But, our daughter's family is moving their membership to a larger church with better programs for children.
We still have our faith, and that is most important.
It sounds like you have come to a cross-road in your spiritual life, and it may be time to move on. You will just have to work at that, just like we will have to search for a new church home, not necessarily the same as our daughter's.
I recently wrote a blog criticizing the metaphor of life as a journey, but it can be seen that way. In the case of our churches, we know what the end of the journey looks like.
All we have to do is decide where we will spend the night on the way there.
Bob, my post isn't about not going to a church at all anymore....I mean it is about not going to church TODAY, but the point was that I didn't go "for some reason"..and the reason popped up!
The rest of the post says how.
But, it's neat that you wrote this comment because I just went through moving from one church to the other. It was a few years coming because it's not an easy decision, but some events showed me I HAD TO GO, and I'm glad I did now. It was wrenching.
When you say "stay at home members" you mean staying at the home CHURCH, not your HOUSE, like a house church, right? Just that you're not moving again like your daughter is? THanks for the encouragement, it really did help.
The Lord's quiet hand in our lives.
AOW - but would you agree that 'The Quite Hand' can also speak Very Loudly?
: ]
like Loud & Clear
I think He's always here, it's things like yesterday's moment wondering why I wasn't getting up and out when He's louder and clearer!
But, I usually sense it's Him and, this time, nada.
Post a Comment