Friday, April 18, 2014

Why?

These are extraordinarily good...have fun!

Why, Why, Why,
 
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are almost dead?


Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they already know there is not enough money?


Why does someone

believe you when you say there are four billion stars; but have to check when you say the paint is still wet?

 

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

   


Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

 


Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

 


Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?

 


If people evolved from apes,

why are there still apes?
 


Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

 


Is there ever a day that mattresses

are not on sale?
 


Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

 


Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
 


Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

 


How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

 


When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?'
 


Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
 


In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

 

 


  I FIGURED WE NEED SOME LEVITY.....

Right?
Got a favorite?

Z

 

 
 

14 comments:

Always On Watch said...

I have two favorites from that list:

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

I'm frustrated every time I visit my grocery store's produce department. So many things to juggle: purse, grocery list, and, of course, trying to get those damn bags open.

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

This old house has high ceilings, and it's a job getting up to those light fixtures. Sheesh.

Frida Van der Wiener said...



Bill Clinton and Senator Hillary Clinton were at a Yankees game. Before the game began a secret service man came up to him and whispered in his ear.

Bill Clinton suddenly picked up Hillary and threw her out on the field.

The secret service man came running up to him and said, "Mr. President Sir, I think you misunderstood me; I said throw out the first pitch."

Rita said...

Frida +1

Ed Bonderenka said...

Well, Kid has some funny stuff up.

Anonymous said...

WHY
Are Progressives Such Pigs?

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

They're all Great!

Not in My name said...

Never met one that I thought had a brain

Anonymous said...

That's because they don't!

The Shadow Knows said...

WHY, are progressive bloggers such Liars?

Average American said...

""Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?"

LOL LOL LOL

What is the last thing a bug sees as he smashes into your windshield?

Average American said...

His A$$hole

T Krabby said...

I heard another one:

Why do we drive on a Parkway and Park on a Driveway?

Anonymous said...

I repeat for the asshat at that Progressive blog who thinks it's a joke!
WHY are progressives such PIGS?

Z said...

Hi, everybody!

SO glad you enjoyed these, too!
They're all so good, aren't they?!

thanks for that addition, Krabby; good one.

For the last Anonymous...there are MANY progressive blogs...we don't really care!