Sunday, October 26, 2008

"Oh, the games people play, every night and every day, now..."


Do you play a computer game as if you were an addict?
I do.

My addiction is ONLINE BACKGAMMON. It used to be FreeCell. I had to not only stop playing FreeCell to heal myself, but I had to take it OFF my computer! (well, Mr. Z did...most of you know how computer illiterate I am!). I am not an addictive personality, but that game really got under my skin. I'd get a phone call while at the computer doing something else, and I'd stop everything and turn on FreeCell and play while I talked. I'd play into the night. I'd play during emails. I played way, way too much! HOURS, folks.

"My name is Z and I was a FreeCell addict." I wasn't terrific at it, but I really couldn't stop! I was in a dress shop once and watched a woman playing Solitaire on her laptop. I said "You ought to try FreeCell!" and I showed her how. Today, I think about her and wonder how long it took her to get on a 12-step program. I feel guilt as sure as I'd taught her how to use a needle and syringe!

Now, it's BACKGAMMON. I like everything about it. I even like the sounds (the die roll, the click as you move, the BING! when you've won..). The trouble is the people on the phone chatting to me while I play don't much like it. "What are you DOING? What's that NOISE?" I quickly reach over and kill the sound.."nothing.......don't worry...it's nothing!" and I continue to play and talk.

I never played real,live backgammon much, though I'm from an Armenian family and Armenians like the game. My mother was a non-declared champion in these parts. I say that because Dad and Mom were once at a cocktail party where the game was being played and there was a world champion there holding court. Dad and Mom's friends goaded Mom to play because she is SO good. She won. So, I consider my mother a world champion! I don't play her because she plays for blood. Suddenly, I'm not her daughter, I'm the competition,and she yells the traditionally Turkish dice mantras like "SHESH BESH!" (she yells it pretty loudly...picture a craps player in Vegas kissing the dice and yelling "Come on, sweetie..give me snake eyes!" (or something like that!? What do I know from craps?!) Anyway, that's my mother....."SHESH BESH!" with evil in her eye and lust for the kill in her heart. I THINK "shesh besh" means "Two Sixes", but I'm not sure. I shy away from seeing my mother like that, so we don't play. Plus, it's so darned SLOW to play a real person and roll real dice, and set the game up every time you're starting a new one. Frankly, I don't even know HOW to set it up by hand, I don't know what goes where! This internet thing has taught me to play (very well, I must admit) AND it's taught me that I now have no patience for playing in person with anybody.........do any of us have any attention span left, anyway? At anything!?

There are international BACKGAMMON PERSONALITIES! Honestly! What's shown on each live game is what country you're playing and their level of expertise. Normally, you get about 80% ENGLISH EXPERTs. They're good players, most of them. When you see a stupid move right from the get-go, you just click off because they obviously are NOT experts, they're just having you on. And, of course, YOU are FAR too good to suffer through beginner's play!!

The Portugese, Spanish, Germans and French are EXCELLENT.....and the Dutch, come to think of it. The Turks and Greeks aren't as good as you'd think, considering that's THEIR GAME. Arabs aren't as hot as you'd think, either. As an Armenian, I get particular pleasure from beating Turks. So to speak.

The Chinese and Japanese and Koreans who call themselves BEGINNERS are the only beginners I'll play because they're NOT beginningers, they're INCREDIBLY good. Every single Japanese backgammon player I've played who listed BEGINNER has wiped me out. And, I may not be in my mother's league, but I'm very good by now.
There are pat little phrases that are available to click on; these make some mode of conversation possible between you and your opponent .... IF your opponent's got CHAT "on". It's about half-half on that. I leave mine on, what the heck? Not infrequently, you'll go on line and immediately see your new opponent's said "Nice try". They think you're the dope who was losing to them in their last game and who clicked off because the going got tough. I rarely do that, so it wasn't me! To indicate it wasn't me (and I'm on to your meaning there, wiseguy), I pick "HELLO" from the list and hope they see from that 'naive' (duh!) response that it was NOT ME. I have always found "Nice try" a little shitty, especially at the end of a game if I lost. And, of course, I wish I could write some of those little pat phrases because OH, have I wanted to use some doozies from time to time! How about "You don't have to move the playing pieces off THAT slowly and deliberately, I SEE that you got a double and you're going to win, for goodness sake, you JERK!"

Sometimes, you'll be seduced into thinking the player's a REALLY nice guy. "Hello" (I don't see the need to chat, but okay....) "Hello" I write back. I make a good move and they'll say "GOOD JOB"... "THANK YOU" I feel I should write back. SO, you're thinking "real, (too)nice person here...but are they going to talk or play?".... then you start to win. They click off. GONE. grrrr Some nice guy, huh?

The dialogue line I just don't understand is NICE ROLL. Tell me, am I supposed to say THANK YOU? How the heck can I do a NICE ROLL on purpose? It's not talent, it's TOTAL luck!! Would you say THANK YOU back? I just do that stupid happy face :-) sign to show I'm a nice person but can't think of anything to say back even if I would like to invent yet another pat chat line like "How the heck can it be a nice roll? And it was thrown by the computer, anyway, not ME, what the..?" It's fun.
So, that's my addiction. HOURS playing backgammon. Some of you who email me should understand that I'm not really sitting here just waiting with baited breath for the next email to answer, it's just that I'm here at the computer PLAYING and so I get back to you fast!! I type emails, make a move, read another, make another move..........I've got it DOWN!!

So...TELL ME...........do you play a computer game? Are you addicted?


Z


23 comments:

Anonymous said...

No. ;-)

Anonymous said...

Spider Solitaire and Bash Barry.

Okay, I made the second one up.

Law and Order Teacher said...

The first step is admitting you have a problem. Just kidding. If you enjoy the game why not play it?

CJ said...

Hearts, Free Cell and Spider Solitaire by turns. I listen to a lot of online sermons and stuff and what else can you do while listening? Also on the phone. Whenever I don't need my brain too much for something else and my hands are free. But frankly I'm bored with all of them. They are an automatic thing I run through. I used to have the whole range of Microsoft games and they were taking up so much of my time I erased them all from my computer. Then I gradually let back in these three. Never played a live game with real people on the other end.

Z said...

BASH BARRY! Wonderful, Mustang! let's start that game.

Oh, I think we already have!?

law and order..I know, I'm not really too upset with the backgammon. I was WAY out of control with FreeCell, though!

Just wondered what you guys play on line!

FJ...you read too much Aristotle and Plato. how much time do you have LEFT? :*-)

Beverly said...

I see some favorites here. I often play JT's Blocks on Yahoo. I also like Hearts. Another one I play a lot is Everyone Wins Bingo. You can't lose! That's what I like. :-)

Rita Loca said...

There's this game where you beat up Chavez...

Sam Huntington said...

I like Pinochle and I have a flight simulator game that is challenging.

One day I hope to take off without crashing. This is not good for my morale, actually, because if Saudi goat-herds can learn it, why can't I?

PS. I blogrolled you.

Sam

CJ said...

Ooo, now you've got me remembering the most addicting ones, and I can gladly say I haven't let them back into my life after breaking the habit. Couldn't even remember their names at first. One is Tetris. That one had a grip on me I thought I'd never give up. Then another game I can't remember the name of, equally gripping, maybe more so. An increasing number of bouncing balls enter the screen with each round and you try to imprison them one by one in smaller and smaller spaces. That's the best I can do to remember it and I know it's a good thing I can't.

shoprat said...

I hate to admit it, but I'm a Civilization III addict and play way too much. I do play a lot of Free Cell but I'm not really addicted to it.

(((Thought Criminal))) said...

ut oh, Shoprat.

I'm a Civilization 3 FIEND!

Wanna play a multiplayer email game?

Misfit410 said...

I'm a bit more hardcore in my gaming.
mainly playing online shooters and military themed games.

Anonymous said...

BTW: When Z talks about multitasking, she is downplaying it. She watches something on the computer (like a Nobama video), answers an e-mail, plays backgammon, talking to somebody on the phone, making notes on the to-do-list, and talking to me (physically) all at the same time.....

Mr.Z

Z said...

Mr. Z is nice to talk (physically) to!!! Hee hee!!

Chuck said...

It's stupid but mine is plain solitaire. I have a hard time "doing nothing". I will call it up and do it mindlessly while talking on the phone or watching the news. I don't even seem to enjoy it that much, it's just a distraction.

da patriot said...

I am not addicted, but my wife is. She is addicted to the games on pogo.com. we share a computer right now and getting time to research and post to my blogs on a regular basis is difficult. On Friday last I got her a Nintendo DS unit and some games that I knew she would like. Now she is addicted to that. I was able to post three times today between my two blogs. My evil plan worked perfectly! :)

Anonymous said...

I grew up playing all kinds of card and board games. When a relative got divorced I was plunked in her ex's seat at the age of eight and had a crash course in pinochle. That was for eight people. When another aunt got married we had nine people, three teams of three each.

Online I like scrabble. I'm not addicted however.

To me, the best card game there is, is bridge. I have played online or against the computer.

I still prefer a human foursome, duplicate bridge. Imagine, preferring humans I can see and talk to, instead of the internet. I must be sick. Ha, Ha.

I do seem to have to keep busy no matter what. It must be that old saying from my grandmother, "idle hands are the devil's workshop".

Pris

Pat Jenkins said...

well told z!!...

The Merry Widow said...

I'm a Age of Empires(The Titan's Expansion) nut. Unfortunately, my notebook's cd drive is out of commission...so I'm making do with solitare...I like Mahjong too.
Good morning, G*D bles and Maranatha!

tmw

Anonymous said...

There's a reason I don't play games against computers...

Nobody in real life would do the things a computer opponent would do, and a computer cannot realistically predict how humans will behave under different situations. There's no "moral component".

For example, there's a story told of a Roman general who was besieging a neighboring city in the early days of Rome. He had the city surrounded and was preparing for a long siege. One day, a teacher from within the city surrenders himself and betrays a number of his students, sons of the cities leaders, as hostages to the Romans. The Roman general immediately marches the teacher and all the students back to the city gate, and informs the inhabitants of the students treacherous betrayal by the teacher, and returns all the children to the city. The next day, the city surrenders without a fight to the Romans, as the Roman general had exhibitted greater moral character than their own leaders were capable of. They were happier to be conquered, than to resist.

Karen Townsend said...

I'm going to check out the Backgammon site. I don't play games online now but I just may with this one! I used to play a lot in college - still have my set - and my husband won't play me because I kick his butt. Every time.

My husband used to be addicted to Free Cell. Then he stopped cold turkey. He did, however, get a few friends addicted to it along the way. I hope he's asked for forgiveness!

Z said...

Thanks, Pat. I know it was long, and I"m sure most of us don't read the longer pieces, but I had such a blast writing it!!

Good to know others share the habit!! Karen, who knows? Maybe we'll unknowingly play each other some time soon!!?

(((Thought Criminal))) said...

FJ,

Civilization 3 has a simulated citizen moods variable. Sometimes all of the people of enemy cities are "happy" to be conquered by you.

Okay, I'm geeking.

Civ 3 played vs. human opponents is a whole different level of fun. And depth.