Monday, June 13, 2011

Tom Brady's friend and Life Lessons.........what would you recommend?

Tom Martinez, who coached New England Patriot (and very handsome, I might add) Tom Brady when he was in high school at San Mateo, California, and was still giving him tips up till very recently, is dying of complications from diabetes.  I saw this and wanted to share it because I thought what he says about LIFE LESSONS is so important.  I hope we can all leave behind life lessons which help others and keep us alive in that way....
Here's the announcement he wrote this weekend upon getting the terrible news:

We have received some bad news that I wanted to share with all of you. I have been given a week to a month to live, depending on my body's response to medication. I want to thank you for the relationship that we shared and the friendships that allowed me to have a very successful career. As much as I would like to talk to you each in person, that is not feasible so please respect my family's need for some privacy now. If the number of lives that I've been involved with are in the thousands, then it isn't possible to talk to each and every one of you. I feel blessed to have had the opportunity to teach and coach you all and I ask that you take one or two of my life lessons and pass them on to your family and friends and that will keep me alive forever. With much love and appreciation, I wish all of you a very successful and fulfilled life. TM.

What a class act he is.  What LIFE LESSONS would you say might benefit others?  If you would, I'd like you to share some.  Thanks.

May God grant peace and comfort to Mr. Martinez and his family and huge family of friends.  And may he not suffer as he goes to meet Him.

By the way, speaking of sports;  I got to love soccer through Mr. Z and flipped when I happened to see what might be called 'the goal of the year'......and it was just another awakening to me that I couldn't say "Hey, honey, look at THIS!" and see his pleasure from watching it.  (by the way, that was a nasty life lesson for me, believe me).  SO..Anybody here appreciate soccer?  Check THIS out and please share what you think with me....! I miss that. I never thought I'd miss someone to talk soccer with until Mr Z and I went to some amazing games in Germany, believe me!


Chuck said...

I think this man has done one of my favorite life lessons/legacies, help young men and women become good adults.

This is something I fear we are losing in public education.

Sports too often has become about winning, not integrity and team building.

Education has been more about preserving the status quo for the NEA, and pushing a far-left agenda then teaching principles, ethics, and even reading, writing, and math.

I am not a teacher in education but I teach a lot of new RNs, students, and even children/young adults in my job.

What I feel is one of my greatest accomplishments as an RN is not just what I have done for the likely thousands of patients I have been in contact with over the years but what I have passed on to younger nurses.

I have taught the obvious things like how to perform procedures, assessment skills, recognition of changing conditions, etc.

More than that though, I have tried to teach them how to be strong advocates for their patients, how to treat their patients with respect, how to be compassionate for the people that really need our help.

This is what I will remember when I am done.

Ducky's here said...

I think my attitude was best expressed in Robert Altman's "Prairie Home Companion", which was basically a film about death, in an exchange between Garrison Keillor and Lindsay Lohan (who wasn't a bad actress before it all went south).

"I'm of an age when if I started to do eulogies, I'd be doing nothing else."

"You don't want to be remembered?"

"I don't want them to be told to remember me."

beamish said...

"You are not your f*ckin' khakis." - Tyler Durden, "Fight Club"

Mark said...

I love soccer. The reason so many Americans don't is they don't understand the difficulty of scoring a goal without going offsides.

"Never expect your best efforts to be successful."

Sounds negative, I know, but it isn't. If you expect success, and you fail, you are disappointed. If you don't expect it and fail, you aren't disappointed. If you are successful, you are pleasantly surprised. Both encourages you to keep trying and/or try harder. Either way it's a win/win.

It is a life lesson I have learned and passed on.

Brooke said...

Meeting the Reaper with calm aplomb.

Good on him.

Z said...

Chuck, thank you for all you do. I agree about our school system and the sports system.
And, of course, not only will you remember when you are done, but so will thousands you have helped.

Ducky, I hope nobody ever has to be told to remember you after you're gone.

Mark, thanks for the soccer input! Also, the game can go for long periods without scoring; I think Americans don't much like that, you know? I guess that's why the goals are so exciting; they're SO DIFFICULT to achieve.
I give those guys credit for the physical shape they're in...running such long distances for so long.

Thanks for your life lesson, do make a good point :-)

Brooke, isn't that a class act.

Ducky's here said...

That's okay, z. I am perfectly comfortable with the idea of the world continuing without me.

Telling someone they have an obligation to remember you is the highest impertinence.

Bob said...

It is always sad to see a good man die before his time. But, it is not my charge to determine things like that.

I have several life lessons, a couple of which I will try to relate herein.

1. Do not judge those in need. For example, I almost always will give money to pan-handlers and homeless people. I never give more than I can afford, and if they are deceiving me, they will have to justify their own actions before God.

As Jesus said, "in as much as you have done it unto the least of these my brethren, you have done it unto me". If a man or woman needs help, I want to be there. If I establish myself as judge over others in those cases, I stand the chance of my own greed interfering.

2. Don't let the little people get you down!
I came to this attitude after decades of professional sales at high levels. If you let the little people get in the way (clerks, secretaries, antagonistic executives, etc.) you will never reach your goal. There is always a way around them, or a way to mitigate their influence. If not you can find another game to play.

Spurious Missives

-FJ said... about your negative vibes, professor duckmeister... the man wasn't so arrogant in specifying that any passed-on lessons cast him in a "positive" light.

That being said, I think we need to have a contest to come up with the best epitaph for the duck's tombstone...

Here's my entry.

Alien tears will fill for him; Pity's long-broken ern. For his mourners will be outcast men, And outcasts always mourn.

It was good enough for Oscar Wilde.

WomanHonorThyself said...

nice post dad loved soccer too.................happy Monday my friend!:)

Bob said...

Mark said:
""Never expect your best efforts to be successful.""

That's good stuff. It is almost straight from a Dale Carnegie book. He said something like, "Always expect the worst from people. When they do the right thing, it will be a pleasant surprise".

Of course I had the Dale Carnegie course decades ago. That course was a major influence in my personal and professional directions.

Mark said...

I never read Carnegie. Nice to know I'm in good Company.

-FJ said...

My prayer:

Zeus grant me to repay the friends that love me, and mine enemies that have proved stronger than I; then shall I seem a God among men, if the destiny of death overtake me with all paid. - Theognis (337-340)


-FJ said...

That way, no one will ever have "to be told to remember me."

Acta non verba. ;)

Z said...

Ducky...FJ's right about this amazing man who was trying to alleviate the grief of so many friends who have been trying to contact him before he goes. I hurt for you when you read things like you do.
enough said.

FJ...did you know Oscar Wilde's tombstone in Paris ALWAYS has lipstick kisses all over it? It's a kind of tradition there for women to kiss it! Maybe men, too :-)

Bob, your 1 and 2 are excellent.
I used to not give money to people I thought would probably spend it in places I didn't agree with...But I changed; if I feel like I should give them something, I do. I suddenly thought "who am I to judge where he spends it? He needs it, I have it...done deal." I so agree with
I'm not too good with #2. I'm very passionate about a lot of things and expect better so I get very disappointed. It dovetails Mark's Carnegie advice, I think.
But, I'm working on it!, too.

Z said...

FJ...that's what's so beautiful about Martinez; his actions had meant so much to so many that he didn't have to do anything but remind folks that if they liked what they'd got from him in watching his example,use it and pass it that way they could stay close to their dear friend.
A great balm for those many who are grieving and wanted to get in touch with him though he has to ask for privacy now at the end of his life.

Bob said...

-FH said:"Acta non verba"

OK. The Latin cat's out of the bag.
Illegitimi non carborundum

beamish said...

I think we need to have a contest to come up with the best epitaph for the duck's tombstone...

"This side up"

-FJ said...

...with arrows pointing up and down?

His death, as his life, would then be celebrated with "spin".

And I never realized that Wilde was buried in Paris. Thanks, Z, for sharing that fascinating tidbit.

Z said...

that's it, FJ. Thanks. See the LIPS :-)

Jim Morrison's grave is there, too...and always graffiti-d and chipped away by fans...We saw at least two bunches of teens visiting that who weren't a twinkle in their folks' eyes when he was alive and making music.

I have a small photo of Chopin's grave by our piano....

that cemetery is amazing. On our first trip there, a year or two before we moved there, poor Mr Z had meetings at the La Bourget air show and during our time together, all I wanted to do was go to the cemetery. He used to tell people all the time "I take her to Paris and she wants to go to Pere Lachaise cemetery!"
(and also to the great restaurants, of course)

-FJ said...

I suppose that more than a few men/ women would prefer to be judged by the company they kept/keep...

That's quite a beautiful place and assemblage of dignitaries. I can see why you enjoyed visiting it.

Debbie said...

Sounds like a great man and what a way to leave this world, thanking others.

Right Truth

Z said...

Isn't that astonishing? really cool, FJ. I could have walked there forever.
It's like walking in Westminster Abbey but at least in Paris you don't feel like you're walking ON the dead as you do there :-)

Scotty said...

Of course I had the Dale Carnegie course decades ago. That course was a major influence in my personal and professional directions.

Me too, Bob! Nice to know I’m not the only dinosaur in the crowd! My favorite was a book by Og Mandino “ The Greatest Salesman In The World”. That is STILL and inspiration for me!

“Always render more and better service than is expected of you, no matter what your task may be.”

“Do not listen to those who weep and complain, for their disease is contagious.”

And, My most favorite:

“Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.”

All from Og Mandino

Z said...

Scotty, someone gave me that Og Mandino book a long time ago...I should have read it :-)
VERY good advice there.

Debbie, a very great man..

Susannah said...

Poignant story, Z. I don't know this man, but I'm thinking he has the right idea - acknowledge those who helped him achieve, then shelter his family.

Great soccer goal! My soccer-player son & I just watched it. Terrific! (I played, back in the day, too.) Very exciting when that happens -- and Mark, I was looking for the "offside" but didn't see it! Next thing I saw: the ball hitting the net. Excellent!

Bd said...

Bob said...1. Do not judge those in need. For example, I almost always will give money to pan-handlers and homeless people.

Hollow words from a righty whose party's conviction is to hate those on welfare, food stamps or even unemployment.

Z said...

Bd...I'm so glad you wrote that. It just shows so much.
I think you're the most unthinking, uninformed lefty I have ever had here and that's saying something!
But, you plod on :-)
Ya, we all HATE the poor...we're all STINKING RICH and we hate THE UNEMPLOYED because NONE of has has been there! (hilarious)
this was a good one...thanks

Elmers Brother said...

Hollow words from a righty whose party's conviction is to hate those on welfare, food stamps or even unemployment.

Actually BD, unlike you and the other blithering liberal idiots, we don't equate compassion with government programs.

Bob said...


I was going to use you as an example of one of those little people in my comment, but you have made my case for me.

Thanks for being our token liberal.

Spurious Missives

Z said...

Thanks, Elbro..:-) (good to talk to you today)

Bob, he's not my token liberal; Ducky is that. Bd is my token uninformed, unthinking liberal.

Jan said...

Hollow words from a righty whose party's conviction is to hate those on welfare, food stamps or even unemployment.

Bd..where do you get the ridiculous ideas you post on here?

It just so happens that we, as Conservatives, really do care about all the ones you mentioned, and we do more without even trying, than leftists like you do with your phony, hypocritical, progressive, 'caring.'

As Elbro said, we don't equate compassion with government programs.

I'm wondering how often you've give a homeless person money from your own pocket, or donated to a worthy cause, out of your own pocket, just because it was needed, and the right thing to do.

Once, while loading groceries into my car, a guy who looked down on his luck asked for money for food. I had no cash left, but told him to take anything that he thought he could use from the food I'd just bought.

He chose things that could be opened easily, or eaten right out of the can, which told me that he probably was homeless.

Perhaps he was because of his own shortcomings, but to me, he was someone in need....and Jesus said if you see someone in need to help them...and that's what most of us calling ourselves "Conservative," or "Christian" do.

Why don't you stop criticizing us, and try it for yourself, sometime?

It's good for the soul.

Z..I think the best life lesson is this:
"Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you."
Luke 6:31

Jan said...

*given* :)

As in "Give unto others and it shall be given unto you."

Susannah said...

"we don't equate compassion with government programs"

Bingo!! and Thank you, EB.

Pris said...

Ive learned that being loved is wonderful, but that to love opens our hearts and is the answer to being more selfless, and giving.

Also, to me, having children makes us care more about the future, and it isn't all about us anymore. It's about leaving a legacy of promise for them.

Z said...

Pris, I thought Cain covered that well last night when he said the debate is about his grandchildren.

Even I, who chose not to have kids, feel that strongly...but it's putting America first, too, as I know it is for you, too. they deserve the America WE knew.